Chapter 7: Window into my Past (if the Window were made of glitter and JAG)

So, it's been a while and it's been said (to me at least) that the frequency of my posts is decidedly low...and that this is not okay. Also, I have recently received rave reviews for the first 7 chapters of Whiskers on Kittens, allow me to share them with you (as if you had a choice)
"Whiskers on Kittens is [truly the best piece of writing I have ever reviewed. Gaze in gazemazement at the brilliance that shines from every word, clause, sentence, and paragraph...if you're not blinded by it!]"
-The New Yorker...or the New York Times...or People (whichever you identify with most)
"Write more. It's starting to [upset me greatly] when I check Whiskers on Kittens and see that you haven't written since mid-February."
-my Dad (I know that you are all duly impressed so I need not add any alternatives)
There were scores of others, but it is too much of an effort to make them up...I mean copy them down...and I don't like to boast, because I'm humble and stuff.
Let's see, what's happened since last I/you wrote/read....hmmmmmm...well, I have become master of many jobs. I am lead animal therapist (or only animal therapist) (also, I would like to clarify that I am not providing therapy for animals but for kids...and by therapy I mean we play with Lucky). In all seriousness, working with Lucky can be helpful for the kids. I work with one kid at a time and each one has to clean out Lucky's house and fenced in outside area (sweeping, raking, shaking blankets etc, removing poop (I am actually rewriting the post from this point because the post that I just finished didn't save and so didn't publish and I lost most of it, but don't worry, I'm not going to change anything, because I'm too tired)...it's not a ladylike word, but it sure is funny...sometimes), feed him, give him fresh water, and exercise him. This promotes responsibility and a sense of importance and mastery in the individual...which is good. (Obviously I can only have a couple of kids work with him each day, otherwise he would be overworked, overfed,...overcleaned?) There are other benefits, but this isn't a lesson/treatment plan and I don't feel like writing the social work rationale, I just didn't want to inadvertently belittle the work at the school while describing my duties. So I do my animal thang (I meant to write it that way) and provide a beverage service (tea or milk for the kids at lunch time and tea for the teachers that I like...I mean the ones that want it) and I also tutor two kids in English during the day. The other students are upset because they don't get special work time with Missy Gwynedd...they have no idea how not cool/not fun I can be...and how difficult English can be when you don't have any classmates to hide behind. I'm sure there's other stuff that I do, but I can't remember it right now. I am certainly able to keep busy and for those few moments of down time, there is always another level of Bejeweled 2 that needs conquering. Now onto events that have occurred since last I/you wrote/read...
In case anyone was curious, the pasta sauce I spoke of in my last post turned out okay, but not nearly up to standard. The three types of canned tomatoes were to blame...and the fact that I had to use oregano instead of basil...and the Fates were seeking to destroy my sauce-making confidence. Mission accomplished.
(I feel my focus drifting and my will to keep writing fading...especially since I have already written this post once...freaking automatic save button that doesn't save! Curse you...you inanimate almost object! I will likely be trailing off soon)
I am morphing into my high school self. Allow me to explain. In high school I was a complicated individual with many interests and layers...okay, that's a lie. I loved two things in high school...JAG and glitter (sure, I rowed and liked school and had friends and seemed like a normal individual...but really, it was all about the glitter and JAG). What is JAG, you might ask? (Or maybe you might not, because you already know it was an awesome TV show about Navy and Marine Corps lawyers which would make you a complete and awesome person) And if you did ask that question, please refer to the parenthetical reference that preceded this sentence. Anyway, I was pretty hooked (some might say addicted...I may or may not have yelled at my carpool home from crew when I thought I was going to miss a show) on JAG all through high school. When I went to college, I cut the habit cold turkey, partly because I had no time and partly because it was cancelled after its 10th season. I was JAG free until this past week, when I broke into my Christmas present of seasons 1-4 of the show (I chose not to write JAG again because I felt I was overusing the word...acronym...whatever). I only have 3 discs left in season 4. So that accounts for half of my personal High School Musical morphing. The other half came into play today. Sunday is Mother's Day over here (don't worry this connects) so the kids made cards for their moms. I was in charge of adding glitter if it was desired (and who wouldn't want it, I ask you?). I have honed glitter application to an art form and I displayed my virtuoso skill for students and teachers alike. Everyone was in awe, as well they should be. It was like Cocktail, but the alcohol was glitter and glue...and I didn't throw the jars around because 1. it would have wasted precious materials and 2. once you spill glitter, especially the glitter I use, it gets all over everyone and everything and you can never get rid of it no matter how many times you vacuum or shower...just ask Kristin and Adam (of course you'd have to know them to ask them so that reference only works for a few people...oops). But it was still super awesome and electrifying. Needless to say (and yet I still feel the need to say it) Mother's Day will be considerably more glitter-y this year.
And there's the other half of my teenage self. Glitter and JAG...JAG and glitter. It could have been worse.
And this post could have been more coherent, but it wasn't (actually, it is considerably more coherent than the original version I was going to publish but couldn't because the blogspot Fates are totally uncool and lost my work...grumblemumblemumblegrumble...count yourselves lucky that it didn't publish). It could have been worse (as I just mentioned), actually it could have been excruciating. In my JAG-crazed state, I could have given you a minute-by-minute description of an entire season...trust me it wouldn't have been pretty...even if I had thrown some glitter on it. Until next time...may you life be filled with sparkles and lawyers (hot lawyers in uniform on TV...not the ones that cost a lot of money)